Saturday, 30 June 2012

iBaked, iAte, iCheated

:( With my head hanging in shame, I mournfully type this post. After nine days of success, yesterday I failed.

The story of my failure, I shall narrate in detail as promised.

The day had started off well, as I slept soundly till late, blissfully unaware of how despite of having built up a strangely comforting amount of will power over the last few days, life would play a cruel joke on me.

Location: Fiance's house
Occasion: Lunch

Need I say more? Yes, maybe one last detail is required. We are Punjabis.

Hona kya tha, doston. I had foreseen that this day would be a test, and I was up for it. I had prepared myself mentally, researched the best ways to decline offers -- polite, yet firm no's. I had even baked brownies and not tasted any, even though I kind of knew I was entering dangerous territory by carrying along dessert. I knew the dangers well beforehand -- 'chalo, jo brownies khud laye ho, woh toh khao!' -- and how suspicious it would seem if I didn't eat what I have baked and forced them to!

But the truth iiiis, I held my ground with those brownies too ... they were not what failed me. It went something like this:

We had finished lunch -- yum dal makhani, shahi paneer and naan -- and I knew the moment of truth was close. At first was unveiled a box of mithai or sweetmeat (yes, I want to believe I am catering to an international audience, hence the translation). It was offered. I revealed my first play: 'Nai, Mummy, abhi nai. Bohot khaa liya. Thodi der mein.' (No, Mom, not yet. Have eaten too much. Maybe in a while.) Luckily, my in-laws aren't too persistant, and so I was saved.

I thought I had dodged the bullet till a while later when little Mehar (my 3 year old niece), wanted to cut the brownies her new chachi had got and get everyone to taste. Luckily, once they were cut, Mehar enjoyed her piece too much to share it with me. God bless that little greedy child :) Just when I thought I got away, Bhabhi was upon me, 'it's really nice, have some!' Play number two: 'No, no, this is for you! I am glad you liked it...I am still too full.' Phew.

Friends, I thought I was in the clear by now. And I am sure you are wondering how could I have possibly cheated. But this is a Punjabi household. There's mithai, there's cake and there's ice cream always in the fridge. After another hour of chatting up. Mom-in-law entered with ouce cream and now I had no excuse. It had been an hour since lunch and I could not have said, 'too full'. And a third time is hard to decline, no? In-laws or no in laws? :P

But I still had hope. My beautiful fiance had not taken his bowl of ice cream and the plan was to sneakily hand over my bowl to him -- something we do often whenever I go to his house (prone to being overfed, what can I say). But that sneaky little munchkin of mine bailed on me! Can you believe it! Looked straight into my eyes and gave me a devious smile! Oh he knew what he was doing!

So that's it guys. Two tablespoons of ice cream were in. Just when I was evaluating reasons as to why I was marrying the betrayer, he took the rest from me and all was 'sweet' again.

The End

P.S.: yes, yes. Date's been extended. Now no meetha till 23 July. Bleh.

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